A Small Price To Pay

Ari stood in the blank white room, as before in Toby’s dreams.  He realized that his mind was not going to be let free to roam on this night, and felt a tinge of disappointment even as his dream body smiled at Ari.  She looked at him, amused.

“I know you want to go back to your own dreams, but I needed to tell you something and I didn’t want to wake you up, so I decided to invade for a little bit.”

“Okay... ”  Toby waited for the important news.

“Your dreams tonight will give you clues as to your power.  Zeus, although he can not determine it, can urge your powers to reveal themselves to you.  No one knows what they are, so good luck.  Your mind may give it to you straight up, or in a series of images that you will have to interpret.”

“Okay.”  Toby said and faded back into unconsciousness.

“I don’t remember a thing from last night!”  Toby complained to Ari when she appeared to him the following day, and she shrugged, smiling.

“We can’t make you cooperate with yourself.  You have to do it by yourself.”

“I still don’t remember anything.”  Toby grumbled, consoling himself by taking a large bite of the juicy Macintosh apple he had pulled from his pocket.  The tart, cool flavor filled his mouth and he almost moaned in appreciation.  He hadn’t had an apple in a few weeks, and he was definitely appreciating it now.  Maybe that was his power.  The ability to make things taste good.

Toby sighed and took another bite as Ari readied the equipment behind him.  Today, they were going rock climbing.  And he was all for it, he was just... frustrated that he hadn’t gotten anything out of his dreams from the night before.  The last thing he remembered from the night was Ari telling him that his powers would reveal themselves to him.  But he had no fucking clue what they were.

“Alright, kiddo.  Step into the two circles and bring the equipment up your thighs as far as you can.”

“What’s the point of this, again?”  Toby asked her as he did as she asked.  The straps were definitely not on the comfortable side as they slid farther up his legs.  “I mean, I know its pretty awesome, and I’ll give you that,”  Toby cut her off before she could answer him, “But I don’t see how climbing a big fucking rock is going to help me control nonmortals.”

“Well, Toby, if you can climb a ‘big fucking rock’, then you can pretty much do anything.”  Ari had pulled a goddess trick with that statement, changing her voice briefly to imitate him exactly.  “And besides that, you’re right.  Its fun.  And I never got to do it while I was mortal.  Hell, I even invited my husband for today’s lesson, but he looked at me funny.”

“Why walk when you can fly?”  Toby asked, smiling at her and then yelping when she bent over and yanked the straps tight onto his thighs until they were riding up into more personal and sensitive areas.

“Why reproduce when you can rock climb?”  Toby amended his statement when he got his breath back.

Ari held up the chest harness and pointed to Toby’s arms.   “Hold them out.”  Ari commanded him and he held his hands out obediently.  “Now I have to put this thingee like this... ”  Ari said as she fiddled with the strap on his back.

“If I fall and kill myself, I will kill you before I make it to Hades.  Do you know what the hell you’re doing?”

“I think so.”  Ari said, laughing as she hooked the back part of the chest harness into the back part of the leg harness and pulled up, eliciting another groan from Toby’s mouth.  God, that hurt.

“Well, if you promise that I won’t die today, I’ll go.”

“You’re not going to die.”  Ari admonished him.  “Its going to take pretty much a fall out of an airplane or old age to kill your ass.  There’s only a small part of you that is mortal.”

“Excuse me for feeling very, very mortal at this moment in time.”

“You can not fear that which presents death as closer to you than at any other time.  Truth be known, it’s a little bit of you and a little bit of Hades that controls you death.  And your death is not in the cards for a long time.”

“Whatever.”  Toby said.  “So when do we start?”

“Now.  Start climbing.  I’m down here to catch you if you fall.”

“Seriously?”

“Yes.”  Ari said, laughing.

“Fine.”

Toby reached up the wall.  Well, it wasn’t straight up.  And he did have a safety harness. They weren’t even outside – they were in a closed up, empty rock climbing wall facility.  A really, really big rock climbing facility.  It was into the whole simulating the actual process idea.

“How come you don’t have me on a real mountain?”

“It would take too long.  Climb.”

“Could you at least hold on to the safety lead?”  Toby asked her.  “It would give me a little comfort.”

“Don’t worry.” Ari assured him.  “You’re not going to die.”

“I know that, I just don’t want to hurt.”  Toby said as he climbed another inch or two up the rock.  He had another four feet or so to go before he hit his first ledge.  It was more like oversized, rock colored stairs.

“What do we know about pain?”  Ari called to him, and he paused in his efforts.

“There’s always a sacrifice for any task we set out to accomplish.”  Toby called back to her, reaching for the next hand hold and missing.  He gripped the one he had been holding, swinging precariously a few feet above the ground.  The mat below him did not feel that soft.

“If you use mostly your leg strength, I’ve heard that its easier.”  Ari gave him some advice as he seemed to be stuck in the middle of the first rock part.

“You know, most people start out with tasks less odious than this one.  Like the wall on the other side of this place.  Where are we, anyway?”

“I convinced this place – we’re in Massachusetts – that they should all take the day off.  And the wall on the other side is for pussies.”

“For pussies?  Why?”

“The hand holds are colored.” Ari said over Toby’s grunt as he made a move towards the next hand hold.  He had only gone up a little and was already beginning to break a sweat.

“If you’re not going to hold the lead, then why do I have this extremely uncomfortable harness on?”  He yelled before he made his next move to grip on to the edge of the first ledge.

“Because for every task we do... ”  Ari began, and Toby interrupted her with a burst of energy that got him over the ledge.

“Fuck sacrifices!”  Toby yelled, pulling himself the rest of the way over the first ledge.

“See?  Didn’t that feel good?”  Ari appeared next to him as he lay spread eagle on the first ledge.

“No.  My hands are cramped, I don’t think I’m ever going to bear children, and I’m sweatier than a horse.”

Ari laughed at his misfortunes, and then looked at him and at the harness’ lead, hanging all the way to the ground.

“Fuck sacrifices, eh?”  She asked him, and he shrugged.

“It got me up here.”

“You can take off the harness, if you want.”  Ari told him.  “I told you I’d catch you, and we both know it was a pointless exercise, meant to make you feel secure.”

“Next ledge, maybe.”  Toby said.  “Now, get your goddess-y ass back down on the ground.  If I’ve made it this far... ”  Toby looked disdainfully at the eight feet he had just climbed, “Then you either better assume completely mortal form and do it like I did or stay down there and let me feel like I’ve accomplished something.”

“Absolutely.  I’ll be at the top, waiting for you.”  Ari said to him and floated up above him.

“Wait, what about my words of encouragement?”  Toby yelled up after her.

“You don’t get them, anymore.  This is a task you now need to do yourself.”

“I have to make it all the way up there?”  Toby asked, annoyed, and silence met him.  He could make out her figure sitting on the edge a great distance above him, legs swinging on the edge, much like a little girl on a swing.

“Fuck.”  Toby said, looking down from where he had come from.  He had another four or five ledges to go, then one big wall scaling before he reached the top.  He could always refuse, and get down.  But it was fun.  He just wished his friends were there to do it with him.

Toby’s hands were already cramped with pain, and he placed his palms against the cool rock in front of him, beginning to stretch his fingers out a little bit, so they wouldn’t freeze on the next ledge.

But, before he did that, the harness was coming off.  He was now convinced that the only reason it had been put on him was to keep Ari amused at his suffering.  He wouldn’t fall that far, and she was right.  He wouldn’t die.  Probably.

“Ah.”  Toby sighed in contentment as he loosened the bonds on his thighs, letting his boys breathe again.  That had not been comfortable by any means.  He tossed the harness and the rope back down on the ground.  If he was going to do this, he was going to at least be comfortable.  He’d take off his shirt, but the rock surface was scratchy.  Probably to increase the ability to grip it when you couldn’t find a hold.

With no other way to prepare, Toby stretched out and looked for his first hold.  There, above his right shoulder.  He could grab it.  And there was a foot hold about three feet up.  And another one nearby.  He could manage that.

Toby adjusted his grip on the handhold and lifted his leg up to get to the first foothold.  He had just found a new respect for anyone who did any sort of climbing that wasn’t tree climbing.  This shit was difficult.

Midway up the rock, sweat pouring down his face, Toby decided to get his mind off of his task and focus on another one, as well.  Maybe he would be able to remember his dreams after Ari’s proclamation that he would have them.

Legs burning and sweat stinging his eyes, Toby reached for the ledge above him and nearly missed, gripping desperately onto the next nearest thing he could find, the hand hold that his other hand was on.  A dangerous position.  His eyes searched quickly for an alternate.  Seeing none, he went for a different angle.  He’d move a leg and his other arm at the same time.  He’d get to the ledge quicker and have better balance.  And then he’d worry about the other two limbs.

There, a rock a foot up from his right foot.  He could make that, and then step... well, he’d figure that part out when he got there.  After all, the extra foot would let him get up on the ledge, and if he was up on the ledge, he could take a break.  Get some water from the water ‘backpack’ he had donned before his excursion.  He looked up at Ari, her legs still swinging freely above him.

“There are sometimes when I dislike you a lot!”  Toby yelled up at her, and her only response was a brief pause in the leg swinging.  Then it resumed.

“Gah!”  Toby yelled as he pushed up with his left leg, praying that he would have the coordination to complete the idea.  His hand reached paradise, the ledge above, and his foot barely on the foot hold he had chosen.  It probably wasn’t the best choice, but there wasn’t any better choice.  Toby grunted as he pulled himself up to the second ledge and lay there, panting, sprawled out on his stomach.

If only he was on a real mountain.  Then fluorescent lights wouldn’t be shining down on him.  The sun would.  He could take a nap.

Sighing, Toby rolled over and pressed his palms against the cool rock ledge, stretching his fingers out again. If he had been big on playing instruments, he would not have been able to for a few days after. Or something. They weren’t even burning anymore, just kind of numb, scratchy. Weak.

Time for the next ledge. A little higher up – maybe fifteen feet up? Twenty? He looked for his first handhold. Everything on him hurt, and he was only part of the way up. He could still see Ari, hanging on the ledge above him. Anger flood through him and he reached for the first handhold and searched for a foothold. He would make it up, if only to spite her immortal being ness.

Why couldn’t he fly like she could? What was that special power that she claimed that he had? He supposed he could just have schizophrenia and be living in a separate world. Maybe it had all started with that hit on his head. And whenever he wandered into the woods near his house his mind would just start to drift until bam! He managed to create an entirely new world for himself to live in. But was he really that afraid of going to college?

Enough that a mild concussion would delude him to the point of believing that he was three quarters god with no real proof to that claim? Again, the thought of jumping out of that tree hit him. Had he been suicidal that day? What about now?

He couldn’t look at his hands, but he could certainly feel them as he climbed towards the next ‘rest stop’, and they definitely did not feel like a fake sensation. If he was less of a man, he probably would have years coming out of his eyes. It was actually a wonder they weren’t bleeding.

What about a little while ago, when he broke his nose? He never had his nose broken before that but – shit, where was he going to go from there? He looked up and saw no viable hand holds that he could reach. The only way to continue was to use his feet to get to his current hand holds and what? Dig his hands into the rock wall?

Maybe that was his power. He could go through solid objects. He felt the rough surface against his hands, and realized that he didn’t have much time to think. His entire body was shaking, and the rock ledge below him would not feel comfortable if he fell. Would not feel good in any way. And Ari claimed she would save him, but what if she had stopped paying attention?

Taking a breath, and shaking so much he could barely grip the holds he did have, he decided to take a chance. The fall wouldn’t kill him. He leaned back, all of his weight and balance in his hands momentarily as he judged the difference between his current foothold and his new one, just a few inches below his hip. He could manage it. Three, two, one. He moved. Leg up, into a very uncomfortable position. Part one of his maneuver was completed. Now for the hard part. He had to reach up about four feet above him, and the only thing that would be touching the wall would be that foot, coiled and ready to spring below him.

He moved, launching himself up, hanging onto his handholds as long as possible, getting his torso as high as he could before moving them. He felt himself falling back and he searched for the holds above him, desperately, and at the last moment, gripped on them, his back end hanging precariously out and throwing off his balance, one foot without a hold, shaking, but alive and well.

Where could he put his foot, then? There was another big leap, but there was one thing he knew, he couldn’t stay in his current position for very long. As it was, the next two ledges far above him weren’t looking very pleasing. He chose a foothold not too far away and made it easily. The top was only four or five feet away, and he could rest, then. Maybe quit. He made another move and gained another six or so inches. If he moved his one leg really far up, he could probably make it to the top in one move. And he could rest. And get another drink – his throat was burning.

He decided to go for it. It wasn’t going to be any easier if he made it in small moves. He tested his balance on his other leg, lifting the first off. He was relatively steady. If he could make it to the hold, he would definitely be able to make it to the ledge.

He made his move. He lifted his first leg up and searched for the foothold with a burst of speed he didn’t know he had. He found it ominous seconds later and adjusted his weight. He wasn’t even sure if he had enough leg muscle to get him up that far. He pushed up with his bottom leg and managed to get enough momentum going to get him up to the foot hold.

Balanced precariously on one foot, he reached for the ledge and found himself half an inch away. As he began to fall backwards, off balance, he searched for a foot hold and something, anything, to hold onto above him. He found a hand hold. He gripped it, sweat pouring down into his eyes – it was definitely not a fun time. He wobbled back and forth.

“Shit.” He said as he lost his grip, fell off the wall.

Wings. It hit him, suddenly. He could grow wings.

Time slowed down for him as it reached his comprehension. He couldn’t fly like Ari, but he could fly like a bird. His back itched something horrible, and he cried out in pain and surprise. Inches from falling flat on his face, he slowed. Landed gently. Back vibrating.

Toby shook his head and looked at the place from which he fell with wonder. Were they real? He reached back behind him and hit a smooth, feather covered surface. Really big. He turned his head, and all he could see was white for at least three times the length of his arms, extending out. Ari appeared seconds later.

“Nice wings.” She commented, turning fully mortal as she stood beside him. “May I touch?”

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